Blog 8 - It will be okay.

It will be okay

“Your worth is not dependent on having achieved traditionally age-appropriate milestones.” – Chani Nicholas 

Through an unexpected and unfortunate series of events, it looks like I will become the millennial cliché of moving into my parent’s basement for a while. That’s not really where I imagined spending my quintessential Taylor Swift year. I’m slowly attempting to accept that my senior year and likely the last “Summer” of my life, will look drastically different than what I planned and those of everyone around me. But, it will be okay. 

It’s not that I’m unemployed or a dropout or on the front page of a tabloid bringing shame to my family (at least not yet). No, this is about some really bad news no one saw coming and now we adjust the best we can. It will be okay. 

I’m a planner. I live through my google calendar. If it’s not in my google calendar, then I’m not showing up. Quarantine deleted most of the events for March and April. It seems May – September will be drastically different. Right now, as tough at is to admit, this may be the most difficult thing I’m wrestling with. My google calendar will recover. It will be okay.

Some may shop for the perfect graduation dress for an elaborate graduation party or get really into words with friends. I will be cast in a new role* to help four of the best people I know. It’s unlike anything I’ve done before and there is no time to rehearse. My resume doesn’t quite make me the ideal leading lady. The CAPM model will not get me far. Oh well, the show must go on and we are working with what we’ve got. Time to improvise. It will be okay. 

If you haven’t noticed, I’ve adopted a new philosophy/mantra of sorts: It will be okay. All of it. The laundry I still haven’t folded. The online lecture from 3 weeks ago that is unwatched. The cancelled formals, celebrations, weddings, and vacations. The individual milestones we were looking forward to that are now in limbo. The ever-growing to-do list and the dwindling motivation. The inflow of “postponed” and “cancelled” notifications. The devastating trials each of us are facing in such different ways. It will be okay. It really will. 

*Disclosure: This post is purposefully vague because there may or may not be some realities I am still not ready to accept. It will be okay.

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